Long ride to silly girls

So for some unknown reason I decided to take a ride form Atlanta to Fort Knox Kentucky. A bunch of my mutant friends were going to go camping and I thought what the heck. I check the rout on map quest and it says 320 miles. That’s only about 4 hours of driving and it would be good to get out of town. I ask Liz if she wants to go and she just looks at me funny. So on Friday night I load up the bike and on Saturday I start off at about 9:30 am. The drive from Atlanta to Chattanooga takes about an hour and I stopped for gas and called Liz to let her know I was still alive. Chattanooga is a really cool town with lots of stuff to do and very nice aquarium that will even let you pet a Sturgeon, but this time I was just passing through on my way to Fort Knox. I continued North/West on I-24 to Nashville, about 140 miles form Chattanooga and because of road work and detours it took over 4 hours for this leg and I had to stop for gas in a town that’s only claim to fame was a giant sign that read “USED COWS FOR SALE”. My first thought was that used cows are called hamburger but than I thought ‘Used for what”? Anyway once I got out of Nashville map quest said that it was only another 90 miles up the road, so around an hour and a half. Well Map quest lied. It was about 120 miles to the Fort Knox Exit off the highway, the Fort is about 40 miles past that. Well my four or five hour trip turned into almost 7 hours. I get to the camp, unpack and take a shower.

I start hanging out with the gang and all is going well and I help a little with getting dinner ready and we eat. That was very good but there was an issue, no beer. There were far too many people not drinking and I could not bring my own on the back of a bike so I decided to do something about it. Fort Knox is in a dry county so I had to find a liquor store, everyone told me that the nearest liquor was in Louisville, about 40 miles up the road. There was no way I was getting back on the bike for another 80 miles for a six pack. So I asked the old guy running the camp site, he was displeased that anyone would drink a beer but he did tell me if I took a Left out of the park (heading away from town) that the county line was only about a mile down the road and that there was a liquor store right there. I got on the bike and five minutes latter I was buying a 6 pack of “Mikes Hard Lemon aid”. That when the vultures started to circle.

Most of the time I don’t refer to hot teenage girls as vultures but these girls were just that. I was loading the Mikes on my bike with a bungee cord when a girl gets out of a car loaded with other teenage girls. She turns to confer with the remaining girls in the car and than starts walking my way. As I finish securing my load this little hottie says “Hi” to me. I reply with “Hello”. She than says “my name is Cindy, What’s yours”? I Say “Keith, Glad to meet you Cindy” and I shake her hand. Cindy than says “sure is hot tonight” to which I respond with “No”. Cindy’s pretty face goes blank for a second as she tries to get back on track. “No what?” Cindy responds. “No I won’t buy you beer” I tell her, Cindy turns and walks away in a little huff. There so cute when there cornered.

Anyway the Drive back was just as long just back words but I now know where the Jack Daniels and George Deckle distilleries are located as well as the Corvette museum, The Lodge Logic and Fruit of the loom factory outlets are located. I saw the Fort Knox Bullion depository, the GM plant at Bowling Green KY, the Grand Old Opera and the George Armstrong Patton museum all from the road.